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A satirical piece that demonstrates the absurdity of banning functional programming practices in the workplace. Through code examples, it shows how attempting to avoid pure functions and functional concepts leads to unnecessarily complex and awkward solutions, highlighting the inherent value of functional programming principles even when explicitly prohibited.

How to stop functional programming

Start by banning JavaScript and that would solve 90% of what stopping functional programming.

Functional Programming is bad only if you don’t use it correctly
If you are “Make every function 20-30 lines each and split into functions if larger,” Then that’s a total disaster.
If you are “I am repeating these ten lines of code everywhere, let me put them in a function and just call it” Then that’s what functional programming should be about

If I can ban anything I don’t (really) understand then nothing can exist lol