how to make programming terrible for everyone

A philosophical critique of AI coding tools through the lens of computer language design. Using the concept of a 'Quine Programmer' who builds an overly complex system, the author argues that good computer languages must satisfy three goals: Interpretation (handling valid/invalid input), Predictability (users can form accurate mental models), and Discoverability (users can learn to express new goals). AI systems, while scoring well on discoverability, fail catastrophically at predictability — users inevitably anthropomorphize them via the ELIZA effect, forming dangerously wrong mental models. The author draws parallels to 1981's 'The Last One' software, which was also hyped as the end of programming, and predicts AI coding tools will meet a similar fate. The core argument: the problem with AI as a programming tool is not technological capability but the fundamental unsuitability of natural language as a programming interface.