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An engineering manager reflects on thriving under high-pressure work while struggling with irritability at home. The pattern is clear: intense work periods lead to impatience with family, creating a seesaw effect where professional performance comes at the cost of personal relationships. Research suggests this is linked to high sensation seeking and dopamine-driven behavior. Despite self-awareness and attempts at meditation and stress management, finding a system that captures work rewards without exporting stress to loved ones remains an unsolved challenge.

I Work Best Under Stress (And My Family Pays For It)

Chris Bongers

Agree with you but starting with a stress-free mindset often enhances the productivity.

The title is just wild 🤣
The content is just on target. I had to learn to care just enough about things at work to rediscover balance.

Man, I suffer from the same thing. My mind always wants a challenge, always wants to think about a solution to an abstraction that looks bad, algorithm’s that keep banging on my head till I visualize them.
It’s shit but feels natural, feels like it should be like this, that’s where I’m comfortable.
At the same time, I see how horrible it is to the people around me, specially my spouse.